In 2007 I met Lauren, the person who would eventually be my wife. One day I asked her to go to Pink Prom (LGBTQIA+ prom) with me and we have been together since. In 2009 we were married. Together we have 2 incredible children, Saige (8) and Dorian (2), that we have raised together from birth, one now adult child whom we adopted as a teenager, Michela (21) when she came to us as a foster youth. We have also had a handful of foster kids, mostly hard to place teens who needed a second chance for love and support.
In addition to our kiddos, we have two fur babies, Jack Jack, our cat who is 10, and Milo our 1 year old German Shepherd that we adopted from the Tacoma Humane Society.
How I became a doula
The very first birth I ever attended was a friends. We were both young, just out of high school, and I couldn't help but notice that her birth room seemed to be a revolving door of different nurses and practitioners. I knew something needed to be different. Several years later, I got pregnant with my first child. Knowing I wanted something different, I sought out the care of a home-birth midwife. Complications throughout my pregnancy led to some back and forth between my midwives and an OBGYN. As those complications resolved, I was able to continue on with my home-birth as originally planned. I felt much closer and more comfortable with my midwife. From a spectators view my birth was beautiful and powerful. Inside my brain was a battle. Before my midwives were there my wife was hilariously running around the house trying to fill our giant tub and stop setting of fire alarms. In those moments, I needed another person with me, but I wasn't sure how to voice it.
My midwife was awesome, and left me wanting to be a midwife myself, but I wasn't ready for that large of a role yet, so I became a doula. With my second birth, I had a doula. My daughter had broken her arm a couple weeks before my due date, and needed surgery to fix the break. She woke up a couple times while I was in labor, so my wife needed to attend to our recovering child. I was so grateful for my doula, because she never left me, and I never felt alone or isolated.
BOOKS I LOVE
Reading for fun is probably one of my favorite things to do, but I don't get to do enough of it. Since I don't have a lot of time, I often listen to books on Audible. I go back and forth between books that are for growth, parenting and fiction. My absolute favorite novels are dystopian novels. I will read them over and over. Here are my favorites:
- The Handmaids Tale
- Ready Player One
- The Danish Way of Parenting
- How Children Learn
- Whole Brain Child
- Daring Greatly
- The Harry Potter Series
- The Ice and Fire Series
- His Dark Materials
- The Book Thief
- The Myth of the Spoiled Child
I LOVE TO BE OUTSIDE
If I could spend my life outside, somewhere warm, I would. But, here I am in the lush and green Pacific North West. There is a saying we have, "there is no bad weather, only bad gear." I have spent a lot of time miserable outside in bad gear. As I got older, I realized I didn't have to be uncomfortable, and neither did my kids. So we go outside rain or shine, and we love it.
At home we have a little garden where were currently growing plants that are pretty, and plants we can eat.